A heuristic exploration into the lived experience of trying to “have it all” at 30: How do professional women experience desiring to mother and career planning against the backdrop of the finitude of their fertility?

A time of heightened anxiety arises for women who have careers and wish to be mothers around the age of 30. It seems that for this group of women, the experience of choosing when to become mothers is imbued with anxiety rich with existential themes such as, choice, freedom, meaning, temporality, mortality and finitude. In this heuristic pilot study, the author reflects on their own experience of this choice alongside another woman’s in a similar situation as an investigation into the lived experience of the phenomenon, The study concludes with a depiction of the lived experience of a woman with a career trying to “have-it-all”. The research found that the experienced anxiety could broadly be divided across the existential themes of; uncertainty, meaning and temporality, and furthermore across the 4 existential worlds. Further research could open up the experience of women in a broad range of scenarios who are negotiating the decision to mother and gain deeper understanding into the factors that impact the experience.